Disciplining your child is not easy, but it is absolutely crucial for their developmental growth so they can grow up to become a healthy adult.
If your child is in between the ages of 3 and 8 (roughly), try reverse rewards. Instead of rewarding for good behavior, take something away for bad behavior. This has been working for us!
Appropriate discipline helps a child
1. Feel safe and secure
2. Manage anxiety and emotions
3. Make good choices
4. Learn self-control
STARTS AT HOME:
At our home, we set limits and boundaries for Kai in order to protect him and help him grow up to be a responsible, respectful, independent and confident adult. What children see and experience in their home environment directly affects their life outside of home. "Setting the tone" at home is a crucial part of a child's development. Home should be a safe place- a place where a child can be open and share his/her feelings. If home does not provide this, a child will find another outlet, may struggle academically or socially, and may cause the him/her to rebel in various ways.
*BE CONSISTENT- This couldn't be more important. As parents, it is our job to create a consistent routine and environment where the child knows what to expect- meal time, bed time, chores, etc. Lack of follow thru makes it harder on us in the end because we end up with a child who lacks structure, when he needs it the most (some more than others). Mom and dad, if we say we are going to do something, there must be 100% follow thru. For example, threatening your child by saying, "if you do that again I'm going to..." and then lack the follow thru, your child will begin to not take you seriously. And believe me, they will test your breaking limits and see how far they can go. It's up to us, as parents, to be the authority, be in control, and set the temperature and standards for all things at home.
*Make rules he can keep- remember the age of your child and be sure whatever you set in place can be achieved and understood.
*Enforce consequences- when Kai doesn't pick up his toys before he moves on to another toy or activity, he knows he will most likely lose a toy for a little bit. Guess what, he cleans up his toys 95% of the time. : )
*Watch the dos and don'ts- sometimes I catch myself saying "do" or "don't do that...". Offering another option instead of constantly telling he/she what NOT to do is much more effective and you will help your child not feel "bad". It is more positive reinforcement than nagging. For example, "Kai, I know you love dancing and being silly, but jumping on the couch is not appropriate at this time." OR "Kai,
I hope this helps!
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